Alice Read online

  ALICE

  First published in 2010 by Oberon Books Ltd

  This electronic edition published in 2012 by Oberon Books Ltd

  521 Caledonian Road, London N7 9RH

  Tel: 020 7607 3637 / Fax: 020 7607 3629

  e-mail: [email protected]

  www.oberonbooks.com

  Reprinted in 2011

  Adaptation copyright © Laura Wade 2010

  Laura Wade is hereby identified as author of this play in accordance with section 77 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988. The author has asserted her moral rights.

  All rights whatsoever in this play are strictly reserved and application for performance etc. should be made before commencement of rehearsal to Knight Hall Agency Ltd., Lower Ground Floor, 7 Mallow Street, London, EC1Y 8RQ ([email protected]). No performance may be given unless a licence has been obtained, and no alterations may be made in the title or the text of the play without the author’s prior written consent.

  You may not copy, store, distribute, transmit, reproduce or otherwise make available this publication (or any part of it) in any form, or by any means (electronic, digital, optical, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise), without the prior written permission of the publisher. Any person who does any unauthorized act in relation to this publication may be liable to criminal prosecution and civil claims for damages.

  A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

  Mobipocket ISBN: 978-1-84943-341-9

  EPub ISBN: 978-1-84943-357-0

  Cover photograph of Ruby Bentall by Craig Fleming

  www.craig-fleming.com

  Cover design by Rare Company

  Visit www.oberonbooks.com to read more about all our books and to buy them. You will also find features, author interviews and news of any author events, and you can sign up for e-newsletters so that you’re always first to hear about our new releases.

  Acknowledgements

  Alice grew out of a close writer-director collaboration, therefore my biggest thanks go to Lyndsey Turner, the best friend a new play could have.

  We’d both like to thank the following people and organisations who helped with the development of the play: The National Theatre Studio, The Actors’ Centre, Samuel West and in particular, Daniel Evans and the staff of Sheffield Theatres.

  LW June 2010

  Characters

  SHEFFIELD

  ALICE

  CATERING WOMAN

  MUM

  DAD

  GRANDDAD

  AUNTIE

  UNCLE

  TEACHER

  TOM

  DAN

  WAITER

  COUSIN

  LEN

  JIM

  TWO LITTLE BOYS

  LITTLE GIRL

  JOE

  FUNERAL GUESTS

  WONDERLAND

  WHITE RABBIT

  CATERPILLAR

  POSTMAN

  COOK

  DUCHESS

  CHESHIRE CAT

  HATTER

  HARE

  DORMOUSE

  BOY

  GIRL

  KNAVE OF HEARTS

  TWO CROQUET COMMENTATORS

  FLAMINGO

  HEDGEHOG

  QUEEN OF HEARTS

  KING OF HEARTS

  CROQUET OFFICIAL

  HUMPTY DUMPTY

  MOCK TURTLE

  GRYPHON

  LOBSTERS

  TWEEDLEDUM

  TWEEDLEDEE

  COURT OFFICIAL

  Note:

  The following Sheffield/Wonderland characters should be doubled by the same actor:

  MUM – QUEEN

  DAD – KING

  AUNTIE – DUCHESS – MOCK TURTLE

  TEACHER – HUMPTY DUMPTY

  TOM AND DAN – TWEEDLEDUM AND TWEEDLEDEE

  COUSIN – CHESHIRE CAT

  LEN – HATTER

  Other doubling is at the director’s discretion.

  Alice was first presented by Sheffield Theatres at the Crucible Theatre on 17th June 2010.

  Cast

  WHITE RABBIT/JOE/WONDERBAND, Jack Beale

  ALICE, Ruby Bentall

  TWEEDLEDEE/COMMENTATOR/DAN/WONDERBAND, John Biddle

  TWEEDLEDUM/COMMENTATOR/TOM/WONDERBAND, Oliver Birch

  DUCHESS/MOCK TURTLE/AUNTIE, Beatie Edney

  QUEEN/MUM, Pippa Haywood

  HUMPTY/GRYPHON/HARE/TEACHER, John Marquez

  KING/DAD/DORMOUSE/POSTMAN, Jonathan McGuinness

  KNAVE/CHESHIRE CAT/COUSIN/WONDERBAND, Graham O’Mara

  HATTER/CATERPILLAR/OFFICIAL/LEN, Graham Turner

  Director, Lyndsey Turner

  Designer, Naomi Wilkinson

  Lighting Designer, Chris Davey

  Sound Designer, Christopher Shutt

  Movement Director, Aline David

  Original Music by David Shrubsole

  Alice was developed with the support of the National Theatre Studio.

  CONTENTS

  ACT ONE

  ACT TWO

  ACT ONE

  The living room of a large Victorian house in Broomhill – the home of the Little family, currently hosting a post-funeral tea on a November afternoon.

  ALICE sits in the centre of the room on a large armchair, which makes her look tiny.

  The room is full of people, mostly wearing black. Some are drinking glasses of sherry or tea from china cups and saucers, others are eating food from a buffet laid out on a table at the back of the room. A woman from the catering company stands by the buffet to serve hot soup from a tureen.

  There’s another smaller table covered in flowers and cards, and there are other chairs pushed against walls – some of them straight-backed chairs which have been moved from the dining room.

  ALICE’s MUM, SUZANNE, sits in a corner on a dining room chair. A couple of guests are speaking to her, offering condolences.

  ALICE’s DAD, GRAHAM, hovers nearby.

  In another corner ALICE’s GRANDDAD, mostly asleep in a wheelchair, is being looked after by two elderly friends from the old folks’ home.

  ALICE’s AUNT and UNCLE are separately talking to other clusters of guests.

  Elsewhere, a middle-aged man, a TEACHER from ALICE’s school, is talking to two diffident-looking boys of about seventeen, dressed as smartly as their mothers could persuade them, but with emo haircuts and very skinny trousers. We hear snippets of conversations from all around the room.

  TEACHER: You don’t often get a proper cup and saucer, do you?

  GUEST: Lovely flowers.

  AUNTIE: So young. Seventeen. What a waste.

  GUEST: I mean it’s not like you can say it was a mercy, is it?

  GUEST: Lovely service.

  AUNTIE: It’s quite nice sherry, actually.

  TEACHER: Difficult to know what to say, isn’t it?

  GUEST: We’re very sorry for your loss.

  GUEST: Seventeen!

  TEACHER: What I remember most is how much he made you all laugh.

  AUNTIE: I cannot imagine what it’s like. To lose a child.

  (To her son.) Stand up straight, Christopher, have some respect.

  MUM: Thank you, thanks for coming. Have you had a drink?

  AUNTIE sneezes.

  AUNTIE: And you know, Alice adored him.

  The guests move away from MUM. AUNTIE sneezes.

  I’m so sorry, it’s all these flowers.

  GUEST: You see those flowers tied to railings, don’t you, but you never think –

  The TEACHER comes up to MUM and DAD. The teenage boys (TOM and DAN) watch him from across the room.

  TEACHER: It was a nice service, I thought. Just the right tone.

  DAD: Thank you. Thanks for reading.

  GUEST: Terrible th
ing, drink driving.

  TEACHER: Well poetry’s very much my thing. Joe said he liked Larkin, so –

  DAN: So weird seeing Hunter here.

  TOM: Numpty Hunter. He’s actually more scary when he’s being nice.

  DAN: I’m starving.

  TOM: Have a sandwich.

  DAN: Mum said don’t eat anything, leave it for the proper guests.

  AUNTIE comes up to ALICE and hands her a piece of quiche on a plate.

  AUNTIE: Eat this, love, you’ve got to eat.

  ALICE nods and puts the plate of quiche on her lap. She looks at it, then at her mum.

  TEACHER: And the photo wall is lovely.

  DAD: We wanted to – you know, to pay tribute, to um, to celebrate his life.

  TEACHER: Important to remember the good times.

  MUM: Crack open the champagne. Why not?

  Across the room the CATERER drops a plate, which shatters.

  ALICE’s MUM jumps at the sound, looking across the room.

  For god’s sake!

  DAD: Suzanne –

  MUM: Well what’s she doing? God’s sake.

  DAD: It’s fine, just an accident.

  A young male WAITER wearing a white shirt and long white butcher-style apron swoops in with a dustpan and brush to help the caterer clean up the mess.

  AUNTIE comes up to MUM with another piece of quiche on a plate and hands it to her.

  AUNTIE: You’ve not eaten, Suzie, you should eat something –

  AUNTIE moves off again.

  MUM: Nobody calls me Suzie anymore.

  (To teacher, holding out her plate.) Would you like some quiche?

  TEACHER: I can’t actually eat eggs, so –

  MUM: Well, there’s soup.

  TEACHER: Yes, I might have some soup.

  The WAITER is passing. MUM hands her plate to him.

  MUM: Sorry, can I give this to – sorry, I can’t eat it.

  ALICE, seeing this, puts her plate of quiche on the floor beside her armchair, untouched. She looks at her mum.

  DAN: Sod it, I’m having a sandwich.

  They start to head towards the buffet table, but are intercepted by ALICE’s DAD.

  DAD: Alright lads? Some pictures of you with Joe on the photo collage – Should have got you to play, shouldn’t we? Bit of music.

  DAN: Yeah, be a bit –

  TOM: Bit weird.

  GUEST: And of course Alice adored him.

  GUEST: Lovely flowers.

  GUEST: D’you know she’s not left the house since it happened?

  DAN: We’re splitting the band up probably, so –

  DAD: What, musical differences?

  ALICE’s COUSIN, a young man aged around 19 sits down next to her, too close for comfort.

  COUSIN: Hi. All these people, huh? Who are they all, you know?

  You know you can talk to me, don’t you? If you ever need comforting or – We could go for a drink or whatever.

  ALICE: I’m twelve.

  COUSIN: No, I know, I know. I didn’t –

  You’re twelve? Hands up – thought you were older.

  ALICE: Piss off.

  COUSIN: Language.

  ALICE: English.

  Her COUSIN gets up.

  COUSIN: Sorry you lost your brother.

  ALICE: I didn’t lose him.

  Her COUSIN moves away.

  GUEST: Just doesn’t seem fair, does it?

  AUNTIE comes over to MUM, who is looking over at the buffet table. AUNTIE is carrying two glasses of sherry.

  MUM: Gannets – look at them all.

  AUNTIE: (Handing her a sherry.) Have a drink, love.

  MUM: You’re having another, are you? She’s had four of those. Gannets.

  AUNTIE: This is my first. D’you think there’s enough sandwiches? Plenty of soup left, so – Good to give people something hot.

  MUM: When did you last see us? When did you last see Joe?

  AUNTIE: Last year, wasn’t it?

  MUM: Three years.

  AUNTIE moves away from MUM towards ALICE. She sneezes.

  AUNTIE: Oh dear, all these flowers.

  GUEST: Lovely flowers.

  GUEST: Lovely service.

  GUEST: Lovely service.

  GUEST: Lovely flowers.

  There’s a sudden burst of loud music – everyone dances to it, like a strange jerky version of the Twist. ALICE looks around in amazement. After a few seconds the music and the dancing stops, and everyone goes back to what they were doing before.

  ALICE’s AUNTIE comes over to the big armchair.

  AUNTIE: Alright, Alice? D’you want a cup of tea or anything?

  ALICE: I’ll have a whisky, please.

  GUEST: Time’s a great healer, you know.

  UNCLE: How’s the soup?

  TEACHER: Bit peppery if I’m honest.

  AUNTIE perches awkwardly on the arm of the chair.

  AUNTIE: It’s OK to have a cry, you know, let it all out. He was a darling boy, your brother.

  AUNTIE looks as if she might cry. She looks for a tissue. ALICE hands her one.

  You just have to give it time. Why don’t you go outside with the other children?

  ALICE stands up, moves towards her mum.

  Bit of fresh air might make you feel better.

  AUNTIE stands up, rubbing her back. She downs the rest of her sherry, then looks over to her husband.

  David?

  GUEST: I mean you never know what life’s going to throw at you next.

  UNCLE: (Showing the teacher his watch.) Water resistant to 600 feet, and that’s a compass and it’s got a stopwatch as well.

  AUNTIE: David, I need you to rub my back, it’s killing me.

  UNCLE: Not here, love.

  AUNTIE: I am in constant pain right now.

  UNCLE rubs AUNTIE’s back, and she makes contented noises.

  Somewhere else in the room someone laughs, then stifles it.

  ALICE hovers close to her MUM. DAD is standing by her now.

  MUM: Not very appropriate.

  DAD: Helen’s being very helpful.

  MUM: Sick of her fussing over me. Where’s she been for three years, you know, where was she when mum was ill?

  ALICE: Mum?

  MUM: Not now, Alice. Do something useful.

  AUNTIE : (To Teacher.) Alice didn’t go to the service, you know.

  GUEST: Of course Alice adored him.

  AUNTIE: She’s not been out the house since it happened. Two whole weeks shut in here.

  A couple of little boys wearing heelies come through, scattering adults in their wake.

  MUM: God’s sake – those are not suitable shoes for – Whose children are they?

  DAD goes after the two boys.

  DAD: Now boys, where’s your mum and dad?

  MUM moves too, nearly bumping into ALICE.

  MUM: Alice, will you get out from under my feet?

  GUEST: It’ll get better with time.

  GUEST: Doesn’t seem fair, does it?

  GUEST: Take it one day at a / time.

  GUEST: Time’s a great healer.

  TEACHER: We all miss you at school, you know. D’you think you might want to come back soon? See all your friends?

  ALICE: Don’t know yet.

  TEACHER: You mustn’t just think of me as mean old Mr Hunter, you know. Come and find me any time if you need a chat.

  ALICE: Thanks.

  GUEST: There’s a lot of pepper in these sandwiches. Big lumps of it.

  GUEST: But the flowers are lovely.

  GUEST: The flowers are lovely.

  GUEST: And you know, Alice adored him.

  A little girl comes up to ALICE, and holds out a cuddly toy towards her. It’s a big, floppy white rabbit. ALICE takes it from the little girl.

  ALICE: Thank you.

  The little girl goes back to her mother, shyly. ALICE holds the rabbit, stroking its ears. ALICE goes back to the armchair.

  On the other side of the room, someone laughs.
ALICE looks at her MUM, to check her reaction, but she’s talking animatedly to another group of guests.

  MUM: Yes, there’ll be a trial, definitely. As big and public as possible. I’ve said we won’t settle out of court, no way.

  DAD: Well we haven’t actually decided that.

  MUM: We owe it to Joe to see justice done.

  GUEST: Lock him up and throw away the key.

  GUEST: Time’s a great healer.

  DAD: Suze – When do we want to show the thing, love?

  AUNTIE sidles over to join the conversation.

  MUM: I mean that man doesn’t have a leg to stand on, he’d been drinking. And then he goes speeding around past a school at chucking-out time.

  AUNTIE: Have to live with it his whole life.

  MUM: Good. They should bring back the death penalty for people like him.

  DAD: Suze –

  MUM: String him up, cut his head off.

  AUNTIE: Very civilised.

  MUM: You know what, Helen, it’s none of your business.

  GUEST: You have to remember the good times.

  AUNTIE: I don’t know what I’ve done to make you so angry at me. I’m very sorry Joe’s passed away, but –

  MUM: He didn’t pass away, he died in massive pain at the side of the road, so let’s not. Let’s not sugar it.

  The WAITER comes up to ALICE, checks no-one is looking and surreptitiously hands her a small glass of white wine. ALICE glances at her mum, then takes the glass. She looks up at the WAITER to say thank you, but he moves away smoothly.

  The two elderly friends of ALICE’s granddad come over to MUM and DAD and AUNTIE. LEN is putting on a deerstalker hat, JIM a flat cap.

  LEN: Er, Graham – Jim and I thought we’d take your dad off now. Hop on’t bus back up Grenoside.

  JIM: Very sorry for your loss, Mrs Little. At least he had a good innings.

  MUM: He was seventeen.

  DAD: Jim’s on autopilot, that’s all. Don’t worry about it. Listen, don’t go for a minute, I was just about to show everyone something.

  DAD goes out towards the hall.

  LEN: We’re actually having a bit of trouble finding your dad’s hat.

  DAD: Oh, um. OK. In the hall?

  MUM: It’s over there on the buffet.

  The hat is on the buffet table, on top of a plate of sausage rolls.

  LEN: Alf, did you put your hat on’t sausage rolls, silly bugger?

  They go to retrieve GRANDDAD’s hat.

  GUEST: I thought the flowers were lovely.

  GUEST: She’s not been out the house, you know. Two weeks!